Yup....I am still alive. I haven't really been living, but I am still breathing in and out. It has been almost a year since I went to the hospital with Viral Meningitis and Encephalitis. The Meningitis hurt, but the Encephalitis has taken away my life. The damage was small...so small that you can't see it on a CT scan or an MRI. So small that the medical community has set me aside with a pat on the head and a basket full of medications. I have been left to sort through the wreckage of what was once an incredibly active life.
I have spent the last year of my life on anti-depressants, anti-anxiety meds, blood pressure meds, anti-seizure meds, pain pills, and nose sprays trying to find some relief from the headache that the encephalitis created on the 3rd of February 2011. Yup...I have had a migraine-like headache non-stop, every day, all day for an entire year. Sucks to be me. *L*
I also have a touch of the dumb. :) I have some short term memory issues, and some word recall issues. Reading a book is quite a fiasco. I have read and re-read to remind myself what the story line is. Sometimes I remember, sometimes I don't. I forget the story lines of TV shows, I forget conversations I had with my husband yesterday, I forget what I wore the day before, I forget that I have told my daughter things that need to be done. I can't remember when my doctor's appointments are. I can't remember if I've taken my medications. I was sure all these little things would come back as time went on. Looks like for now....I am incredibly forgetful and very dependent on the calendar on my cell phone, the calendar on my Nook, the calendar my husband prints out for me and hangs in the kitchen, and my husband (who has a terribly memory *L*). Losing my memory can be worked around. I can relearn things. I can take notes. I just have to get used to the fact that I can't remember things....cause I was always the one who know when the bills were due, when the appointments were.
Ok, so where am I going with this....no where really.....just getting this whole blog thing rolling again. I have a plan I think. My hope is to be off all of my medications by the end of the year. I am far too young to be taking all these pills. There has to be a better way to take care of myself. And so begins my search to find that better way.